There are those of us who envy people who simply ooze love and romance. They talk about how much they love the person they married, now that person is the ONLY person for them. Normally, those people are around people like us (because I used to be this way) who are sitting there listening and wondering why we don't quite feel that way about our mates. And because you know we hate really looking at ourselves, the first thing we do is look at the other person in our lives.
We think, "Well, maybe I didn't wait on the right person because I don't feel that way, that completion in him/her." Or, maybe we think, "If my mate did all that his/hers do, I'd feel complete too." Whatever we think, we never stop and think about what the real problem is. So, Professor Lacresha is going to share a hard truth with you in the sweetest way possible.
For me, I've had some really great relationships with some really crappy ones thrown in for good measure. But never did I feel complete in any man. I was never so in love that another man couldn't catch my eye for a moment or two, even after meeting Christ. Seemed like I just couldn't get no satisfaction, as the song says. So, God had to eventually speak to me and tell me something I'd only receive from HIM.
Drumroll...
It was never the men I was with. It was always me. I wasn't happy with who I was. I didn't really love myself. My conceit that I called confidence was a cloak to hide away those tender areas in my heart. No matter who I deceived, I never could deceive me and never could deceive God. One man's love couldn't fill that HUGE GAPING HOLE that was created because I was never satisfied with me. No one could say "I love you" enough to help it. No matter how much romance was given, I needed more and more and more. It was the Bermuda Triangle of love. That's why I could be in a relationship and still look for more love and more attention, even when my fellow of the moment was giving all he had.
Stop envying those who are happy in their relationships and comparing your mate to theirs. Instead, look inside and see why you aren't complete. See if maybe you don't like yourself. See if maybe you have issues with choosing bad relationships and trying to make them something they will never be. See if maybe you have this huge suck hole that consumes everyone who really tries to love you. Then, when you finish with you, which I can promise will take longer than a moment, maybe you will find a new kind of commitment inside yourself so that you'll be the one gushing about how much you LOOOOOVE your spouse and how they are THE most precious person in the world to you. Don't knock it until you try it!
We think, "Well, maybe I didn't wait on the right person because I don't feel that way, that completion in him/her." Or, maybe we think, "If my mate did all that his/hers do, I'd feel complete too." Whatever we think, we never stop and think about what the real problem is. So, Professor Lacresha is going to share a hard truth with you in the sweetest way possible.
For me, I've had some really great relationships with some really crappy ones thrown in for good measure. But never did I feel complete in any man. I was never so in love that another man couldn't catch my eye for a moment or two, even after meeting Christ. Seemed like I just couldn't get no satisfaction, as the song says. So, God had to eventually speak to me and tell me something I'd only receive from HIM.
Drumroll...
It was never the men I was with. It was always me. I wasn't happy with who I was. I didn't really love myself. My conceit that I called confidence was a cloak to hide away those tender areas in my heart. No matter who I deceived, I never could deceive me and never could deceive God. One man's love couldn't fill that HUGE GAPING HOLE that was created because I was never satisfied with me. No one could say "I love you" enough to help it. No matter how much romance was given, I needed more and more and more. It was the Bermuda Triangle of love. That's why I could be in a relationship and still look for more love and more attention, even when my fellow of the moment was giving all he had.
Stop envying those who are happy in their relationships and comparing your mate to theirs. Instead, look inside and see why you aren't complete. See if maybe you don't like yourself. See if maybe you have issues with choosing bad relationships and trying to make them something they will never be. See if maybe you have this huge suck hole that consumes everyone who really tries to love you. Then, when you finish with you, which I can promise will take longer than a moment, maybe you will find a new kind of commitment inside yourself so that you'll be the one gushing about how much you LOOOOOVE your spouse and how they are THE most precious person in the world to you. Don't knock it until you try it!
3 comments:
girl, girl, girl
You got in my feelings then. You write stuff most ppl would be scared to write.
You are a wise woman, ma'am. I'm one of the lucky ones who found the right man my first time at bat, but I can definitely attest to the incomparable joy to be had in finding that person. For those of you still looking, don't give up--on yourself or them!
I like this math problem: 1 imperfect man + 1 imperfect woman + God = 1 Rock Solid marriage.
Without God no person or thing will complete you. You will always feel unsatisfied. I have a marriage that is not perfect but we both have God. We've been through some times, that a weaker marriage would have crumbled under, but because of God and Him alone, we stuck it out. We will be celebrating our 15th ann. in a month and a half.
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