Showing posts with label envy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label envy. Show all posts
Sometimes, we envy the wrong things in others' relationships and make unfair comparisons in relationships that we would despise if the shoe flipped to the other foot. We compare our man to the men in other people's lives or from our past.
It isn't fair to compare your boyfriends to one another. Past is past and though it can seem like in hindsight you messed up for walking away, truthfully, something wasn't right somewhere or you'd still be in that same relationship. It isn't fair to manipulate and con each other by pretending to be someone you aren't. And we play all these games in the beginning which is the best time to be honest. Later, when you discover the truth about one another, the love fades because whatever bond was there was built off a lie, whether one you told or one you acted out.
There are those of us who envy people who simply ooze love and romance. They talk about how much they love the person they married, now that person is the ONLY person for them. Normally, those people are around people like us (because I used to be this way) who are sitting there listening and wondering why we don't quite feel that way about our mates. And because you know we hate really looking at ourselves, the first thing we do is look at the other person in our lives.
We think, "Well, maybe I didn't wait on the right person because I don't feel that way, that completion in him/her." Or, maybe we think, "If my mate did all that his/hers do, I'd feel complete too." Whatever we think, we never stop and think about what the real problem is. So, Professor Lacresha is going to share a hard truth with you in the sweetest way possible.
For me, I've had some really great relationships with some really crappy ones thrown in for good measure. But never did I feel complete in any man. I was never so in love that another man couldn't catch my eye for a moment or two, even after meeting Christ. Seemed like I just couldn't get no satisfaction, as the song says. So, God had to eventually speak to me and tell me something I'd only receive from HIM.
Drumroll...
It was never the men I was with. It was always me. I wasn't happy with who I was. I didn't really love myself. My conceit that I called confidence was a cloak to hide away those tender areas in my heart. No matter who I deceived, I never could deceive me and never could deceive God. One man's love couldn't fill that HUGE GAPING HOLE that was created because I was never satisfied with me. No one could say "I love you" enough to help it. No matter how much romance was given, I needed more and more and more. It was the Bermuda Triangle of love. That's why I could be in a relationship and still look for more love and more attention, even when my fellow of the moment was giving all he had.
Stop envying those who are happy in their relationships and comparing your mate to theirs. Instead, look inside and see why you aren't complete. See if maybe you don't like yourself. See if maybe you have issues with choosing bad relationships and trying to make them something they will never be. See if maybe you have this huge suck hole that consumes everyone who really tries to love you. Then, when you finish with you, which I can promise will take longer than a moment, maybe you will find a new kind of commitment inside yourself so that you'll be the one gushing about how much you LOOOOOVE your spouse and how they are THE most precious person in the world to you. Don't knock it until you try it!
We think, "Well, maybe I didn't wait on the right person because I don't feel that way, that completion in him/her." Or, maybe we think, "If my mate did all that his/hers do, I'd feel complete too." Whatever we think, we never stop and think about what the real problem is. So, Professor Lacresha is going to share a hard truth with you in the sweetest way possible.
For me, I've had some really great relationships with some really crappy ones thrown in for good measure. But never did I feel complete in any man. I was never so in love that another man couldn't catch my eye for a moment or two, even after meeting Christ. Seemed like I just couldn't get no satisfaction, as the song says. So, God had to eventually speak to me and tell me something I'd only receive from HIM.
Drumroll...
It was never the men I was with. It was always me. I wasn't happy with who I was. I didn't really love myself. My conceit that I called confidence was a cloak to hide away those tender areas in my heart. No matter who I deceived, I never could deceive me and never could deceive God. One man's love couldn't fill that HUGE GAPING HOLE that was created because I was never satisfied with me. No one could say "I love you" enough to help it. No matter how much romance was given, I needed more and more and more. It was the Bermuda Triangle of love. That's why I could be in a relationship and still look for more love and more attention, even when my fellow of the moment was giving all he had.
Stop envying those who are happy in their relationships and comparing your mate to theirs. Instead, look inside and see why you aren't complete. See if maybe you don't like yourself. See if maybe you have issues with choosing bad relationships and trying to make them something they will never be. See if maybe you have this huge suck hole that consumes everyone who really tries to love you. Then, when you finish with you, which I can promise will take longer than a moment, maybe you will find a new kind of commitment inside yourself so that you'll be the one gushing about how much you LOOOOOVE your spouse and how they are THE most precious person in the world to you. Don't knock it until you try it!
